How to drink in class without getting caught. By bringing a metal water bottle filled to the brim with *****. I learned that goofing off in class is more important than actually doing work. So I, fall behind piles of homework on my desk. Feeling all this stress. Which is ironic because alcohol is supposed to reduce stress, right. A smile fixes everything
2. I learned to keep my head held down Hidden at all times Because the judgemental predatorial vultures who lurk the schoolyard 24/7 are always looking for a moment to strike. So smile You don’t have to mean it just fake it Just do it so they never know how you feel and never have anything to say about you A smile fixes everything
3. I learned that I did not fit in because I grew up too fast When I was born mommy and daddy were fighting When I was four daddy was thrown out the door When I was twelve mommy told me daddy was stupid When I was thirteen daddy told me the same thing So whose son was I supposed to be? I came home to comfort my mother's stress because living alone can be a huge mess... I sat in silence with my thoughts I didn’t tell my parents how I feel because I was too afraid of what they’d say. And I knew deep down there was nothing they could do to take it away. Instead I packed my bags and prepared for a vacation across the city every other weekend to my dad's house. Or “stupids” house as mommy liked to call it A smile fixes everything
4. I learned how my heart began to feel And I was terrified that these feelings were real
4. Sadness 4. Abandoned 4. Outcasted 4. Confused I’m sorry when I get emotional I lose count 7. Angry 63. Stressed 91. Anxious 3627… Alone A smile fixes everything. But not a broken heart
5. I learned to be ashamed of who I am. Every day at school I was called a new name, and when my parents split up I was totally to blame. Because my parents had so much going for them and then, they had me. I was their fate. I started gaining all this weight I found out that I wasn't straight Never wanting to leave home, becoming used to being alone Because reality, became too scary. I was never really good at English class until today When I started to adopt my word of the day. Suicide This word soon became my word of the week and even my word of the Month. I had shuffled desperately through my dictionary and could not find another word, to replace it with. Hope… that was a word from when I was a kid. But it seems that my vocabulary isn’t familiar with that word anymore. That page ripped out by hands laced in hateful intention By the same people, who always gave me such negative attention. After all these years, I started reflecting on my life, and remembering what I had done over and over again whenever things got hard. I smiled. And in that very moment, I learned that a smile does NOT fix everything. And sometimes a tear can change a life.
-Adam Purchase
This poem was written to be performed, so it may not make a whole lot of sense on paper. I hope everyone can analyze this and discover the meaning behind it. It is the most personal piece I have ever written about. Please leave feedback, and have a great day.