they do not fit into my hand
or under my bed
no
the ghost of them looms over my house like a cloud
i know the feel of them in the night
they breath on me, fingers in my hair when the wind blows
and each day they whisper my name
and i don't know why they still make me sad
they pull me under
catching me in a riptide

but here
pouring my tears into the ocean
i can finally feel empty
washing my wounds in the brine stings me with regret
but the sea salt spray has taken their smell from me
the wind drowns out their touch
i rise from the foam, a new kind of Venus
now the screaming gulls echo in my ears
finally alone
but i cannot stay here because
the shine on the crest of the waves
is the highlight on their blue eyes
and the sand is too rough
like their hands
my lips chapped from the sea breeze

after years, now i no longer dream of them
the scars have healed over with new skin
their faces forgotten to me
their shape i cannot trace by memory
their names a song i no longer know
not anymore

you ask me how i got over them
i didn't get over it
i just drowned it out until
it was no longer able
to drown me