what is this feeling
this melting away
my insides are weak
in a slow panic
can’t seem to grasp it
why I am this way

I’m on the rise
yet falling

afraid I’ll fall alone

will her steps meet mine?
am I no longer lost
or blinded by an empty hope?

slipping into darkness
an array of thoughts
swarming like moths in a lampshade
hurtful possibilities emerge
saboteur of my own vessel

can another ever love me
want me, need me
as I them?

submerged in cold matter
I’m fragile
forced to live on
my eternal wandering
for a chance to become fully alive

to share my life
what sings to my soul
is an endless desire
I fear that may never change
that my soul will live in shadows
never truly seen or heard by another

I am the only true observer
and that is the feeling of loneliness
that makes me sink into myself

it hurts to be here
painfully present
meaningless
and inevitably forgotten