I have always tried to be the one who helps the lonely and the small. Always telling them that they will get through things will get better I am here with you through it all. I have helped many and have heard there thank you’s and praise. Dismissed those praises for many reasons mostly because I felt I did not deserve them. The other day in happy passing I made a comment of years long passing of a friend who tried and failed Many times over for attention it was blamed. But this person said something that blew my mind. She doesn’t understand and is glad she never has the thought of the often end and those that go with it. I was shocked and had nothing to say for I did not know that people could feel this way. I thought my mind was one of normal not of one who is lost with sadness, lost with the mind. My mind does not let me feel no such thought it is always grabbing hold to tell me my losses. Reminds me of my failings and how much I am a burden it leaves me with crosses that make become halted. So this is such a break through but hard to comprehend I am worthy to be in God’s Plan. I am allowed to love myself as others show me, I am allowed to accept praise when others can see. I am not the loser **** that always breaks through I am a nice person who loves all of you.