its been exactly one month since we parted ways.
i was doing perfectly fine,
but today everything started rushing back to me.
an explosion of feelings. wave after wave,
drowning my thoughts and my heart.
it starts to ache all over again.
i realized... i miss you.
that's what you call this.
it is not anger or sadness,
nor it is the underlying wonder of constant what-ifs.
it is just the plain longing of your warmth and you.
just plain you.
i remember us, lying in your bed.
i pouted because you didn't tell me you love me today.
and you laughed and whispered it to me.
i started to get goosebumps all over,
you know im just sensitive that way.
you laughed again,
held me tight so i could not escape from your grasp.
pinned me down and whispered "i love yous" repeatedly.
i was squealing, laughing, trying to get away from you.
my goosebumps wouldn't stop.
i would give anything to be back to that memory again.
i wanted to remember it forever,
it was so precious to me after all.
i know we made mistakes, through and through.
you probably did not forget them, but i already did.
right now it did not matter, i just want you back to me.
and that's stupid and crazy, utterly impossible.
selfish and cruel to you.
selfish and cruel to me.
last time you told me you miss me.
but that is all there is.
it stops there. there's nothing we can do.
i dont regret anything.
you are special to me, and i hope i would not forget.
that this man once was mine, and once was my everything.
goodbye.