I’ve never been any good at
Using my words,
But I can build a house of bricks
And never tear it down.
My fingertips brush over the
Fine teeth of paper I’ve tried
Countless times to smooth over
With ink for you.

My heartbeat still knocks
After your footprints have long since
Faded and my
Lips still shiver
With the taste of yours.
But I never know
Whether it’s
Love or
Lightning
That we make in between the sheets;
It still sends me into
Shock
All the same.

My subconscious mind is
Buried like pebbles at
High tide,
I am swept into your current
With a choice to
Sink or swim,
And I always
Paddle backwards-
Away from the blood
That’s pumping,
And breath that’s
Humming,
Drumming like my toes on
Cold sheets as I sit
Shaking and
Coated in a damp skin
That longs for something new.

The familiar lull of confusion in a
Quiet mind that’s
Rolling
Like the dice I cast
Each time I open my mouth to speak-
The chances of me saying 3 words I
Continue to choke down
Are dwindling.
The lack of language is substituted
By my mouth with kisses as
My nails scratch at my throat
Trying to force the words out.
Instead I find myself singing songs that
I’ve somehow connected with you.
Is this what love is supposed to
Feel like?

I’ve never been too good at
Using my words,
But I built a house of bricks for you
And I will never tear it down.
So feed my feelings, the ones you’ve
Sewn to the palms of your hands and
Coax the words hidden under my tongue
To your anticipating eardrums,
Or wherever they are meant to
Fall.