I remember believing the best way to love was to do it unconditionally...
That to love blindly
Was to love deeply
And to love with boundaries
Was like not loving at all

Love is supposed to be a mere emotion
Not physically seen
But internally felt
And the rest is up to fates discretion

Love without condition.
Love without rules.
Love without boundaries.

Yet when I attempt to replicate that...

the love becomes unsustainable
Intangible
Unattainable

And so called unconditional love morphs into

Love with harbored resentments

From all the flaws I was suppose to learn to love that I could never find myself to
And all of the things I was supposed to ignore that I never did
To accept all the hurt I never truly healed from

Carelessly trying to offer up understanding
When in all actuality I’m not as pragmatic and as patient as this notion insists that I should be

I cannot love you unconditionally

To love you isn’t to just simply tolerate you

It is to confront you
It is to disagree with you
It is be grow frustrated with you
It is to need space

To love you is to comfort you
To love you is to desire you
To love you is to grow with you
It is to occupy the same the space as you
And to feel
Content with you

Not stagnant

But contentment

To love you
I have to do so conditionally
And that’s okay