Sometimes.. I wish I was still dark. Wish I hadn't been saved.
And sometimes... I wish I could hold on to all of this pain and rage.

But I'm not myself when I follow that darkened path.
I can't deny who I am. Despite my attempts, it never lasts.

I always felt this day would come. The day I wanted it back..
The day I missed the darkness. When I could finally accept the past.

Sometimes I wish I could find myself. Others, I wish I hadn't begun.
Sometimes I feel both... And all that makes me want to do is run.

I wish I was better at writing music. It makes me feel so alive.
But I can't find out who I am. And I really don't know why..

I'm not really feeling any pain.. God took that away from me.
And though it doesn't hurt, I still feel like I'm not yet free.

Sometimes.. I wish I could talk to you. Just **** it up and try.
And sometimes... I wish I was still dark, so that I wouldn't hate to lie.