i woke up in a tear stained lace dress black boots
still drunk with bruised wrists i woke up delicate
feeling hallow i woke up hopeless & next to a
man much older than me no longer innocent
haunted by what he had done still believing he
loved me i woke up ******* manic on a monday
morning to run barefoot & say goodbye to my
friend for the last time & to get high before college
or school but i cant remember which i woke up
from a bittersweet dream where an awful friend
held me under the flowers to say he was sorry for
the things he couldnt remember but i would never
forget & he told me he was crueler than i can
imagine i woke up wishing it was a real apology i
woke up sick in bed barely breathing from too
many pills i woke up devastated to still be alive i
woke up in a cheap hotel room with a boy i met
once at a gig when we had nothing left to give i
woke up faded on medication with my friends
hand up my skirt & i had made sure to wear my
nicest underwear ivory silk since i knew it would
happen again & woke up crying i woke up
desperate i woke up idyllically lonely under death
in the stars i woke up numb & made of porcelain i
woke up not entirely here & woke up bleeding &
woke up grieving. i woke up in everlasting fear

im not entirely sure if i ever woke up this morning