He loves cautiously
He needs to know there’s water in the pool before he jumps, which often makes these romantic moments, so much less romantic. Because a love and let love mentality just isn’t a possibility, at least for him- it isn’t. But I think thats what works for us. He’schecks the safety nets and parachutes and iI well iI uncontrollably free fall, face first, into any feeling that inspires me.
with him, iI can be that wounded girl looking for someone safe to vanish into and he can be the strength neither of us ever had. But for him to do that, for him to feel safe enough to be the strong one, he needs me to tell him simply and plainly, without any room for doubt, that I love him.
So when he asks me with his voice hoarse and bourbon hushed, whispering down the length of our shared pillow, if next year we can spend christmas with his family- I don’t promise him all my holidays or say that with him, christmas can be a can of chicken soup in bed.
instead, I scoot in closer.
instead, I kiss him and tell him yes.