What am I sorry for?

Not being enough for anything or anyone.
Not knowing all the answers not one
Not knowing if I believe in God as three not one.

I really want you to be happy
But how can I when I'm falling apart from the inside out.

I'm sorry I can't keep up with you
Your learning pace at a walk and mine a snail trail of a sad blue.
I try so hard but I will never be like you - smart, capable, intelligent and athletic with that hot *** in shorts of blue.  

Comparison is a toxic relationship
I'm trapped in an endless cycle of contrasting those who are better than me
at academics, athletics or even that 2 year cute couple relationship.

I feel like I'm a mess
I can't work it out when all their success blinds my light to see straight much less.