I told myself I was doing better.
For a while I believed I was.
I told myself I'd be a better me.
For a while I was.
I told myself that I would make it.
For a while I was doing well.
I told myself to not look back.
For a while I didn't.  
Yet once again here I am in the same space. A place I know much to well. A place I am  convinced is worse than hell.
I know this pain. I've been here before.  
Why the hell am I back here?
Why the hell did I let myself........


This hurts so much.