“high school love” is holocaustic, burns you wholly and totally, breaking, screaming, like scraped knees scrubbed with salt.

“high school love” is all-consuming, like fires raging closer and closer until they burn away the freedom and leave behind the fears, the regrets, the ice in the chest that refuses to leave even though the heat is on full blast.

“high school love” is missed kisses weighing on me like lead and even though loving girls is lovely, letting ladies get to me always makes a mess.

“high school love” isn’t a choice for me. i’ve always looked for a forever partner. i should have been born a swan, but here i am.

humans are serial monogamists, my mom says.

she’d know. her dad had 5 wives before he settled down with the right one, and he died before he hit their 25th wedding anniversary.

“high school love” is thinking i found my angel, my soulmate, thinking ‘this is it!!! i’ve found the mother of pearls amongst the shellfish in the ocean’, but Time pushes forward, never stopping,

beating
beating
beating

BEATING ON ME

Time likes pretending she doesn’t hear me cry in the unknown, she likes quieting me to the passing ear, leaving me

searching
searching
searching
searching

searching for the right one, cause if this one doesn’t last forever i can’t waste any more time

i can’t waste any more time
i can’t waste any more time
i can’t waste any more time
i can’t
i can’t
i can’t