Sometimes I forget that what happened to me could be considered ****** assault.
I mean, I kind of wanted it
So that makes it okay.
Right?

But I do remember saying no.
And him pushing
Not physically, of course
But trying everything to reassure me that it was right.
If he did things to me, it would make us both happy
Right?

The second time I was sure it was right
He meant what he said
I could see it in his eyes.
He wouldn't hurt me.
Right?
But he kept wanting more
                                                            and more
                                                                                             and more
And kept asking
Begging
Pleading.

And he was so convincing
And persuasive
Saying it's okay if I didn't want to do this, but doing that would be alright.
Wouldn't it?
It's different
It's still good
It's what he wanted.
But giving in would never please him.
He would always want more
                                                               more
                                                                                      more

But I was strong.
Right?
I was so strong.
I mean, you're supposed to have those feelings
You're supposed to want to do those things
You should want to.
You should enjoy it.
At least that's what our society preaches.
*** is good. *** is normal. *** should be a steady part of every good and normal relationship.
Right?

But what happens when a girl just wants to be loved
And appreciated
And wanted
But not for ***
For companionship.
What then?