i think the reason
we have such dark, 
worrisome thoughts at night 
is because the empty silence 
found right before sleep 
allows room for anxiety
to creep in and fill the spaces 
between the floorboards 
and peeling wallpaper 
of our bedrooms

that may be why 
when i haven’t spoken to you
in awhile, i forget 
all the good mornings
and five page letters
filled with words
that make my heart melt
like candle wax

i allow doubt to dwell in my soul, 
along with thoughts
like how pitiful it is 
for me to be vacant 
because you’re not here
to occupy my confidence
and reassure me that
time nor interval
will change
how you feel