I wanted close my eyes and make believe I was truly happy,
Awake from not a thought nor a dream,
I was blissfully about smiling in delusion,
Of a mildly happy place with smiles across their face,
Only to disappointed with myself again,
I enter blankly into my own space calm as can be,
Once I clock in I'm in theirs,
Every face and voice heard,
All distinct in their own special place,
Somehow I smile while at a place I hate,
All my energy  being drained,
While I must be pleasant and refrain,
My own place where no expression is needed by face,
Where sense had taken place,
Upon those had realized,
It was just waste when feelings can be traced,
By the energy they put forth in such haste,
So slip back into theirs again,
Mine is to complicated for most,
Simply a delusion in that world most call home,
While mine will slowly start to grow,
Into the next stage lets sit back and turn the page