The smell was gagging her. She no longer felt the constant agony which was a relief but the smell indicted A severe infection Perhaps she would get lucky and cross the veil soon Her day of execution was coming upon her She could hear stakes being placed and wagons Delivering peat, coal, and wood Oh how she feared the burning Once as a child she burnt her hand in her father’s smithie She cried till her mother rubbed a poultice of comfrey upon it She never forgot the pain of that burn All the comfrey in the world was not going ease her pain after tomorrow
She remembered growing up hiding in the hay mound Watching her father It fascinated her, turning hot molten metal into something useful Working the elements her father would say was an honor. She secretly yearned to do the same but her father said it was ’men’s’ work So when not in the fields her brothers got to spend time with their father not she
Not that she minded spending time with her grams Learning the healing arts Using herbs and precious stones with magical properties Working the elements but in a more subtle way But she was more drawn to her fathers work And look where her grams legacy has gotten her now If she had been allowed to work with her father and brothers she thought bitterly….
She tried to move and felt an instant stab of pain where her bones had once been Her right foot was nothing more but dangling rotting flesh The Malleous Malficarum meant nothing it seemed The traveling inquisitors did not receive the confession they sought She refused to confess even under torture So instead she would burn to purify her soul They would get their entertainment As would her village
She heard moaning coming from the cell next to hers It was her neighbor old Hatty Beckwith She had been accused by Ned Higbee of consorting with the devil and killing livestock The whole village knows Ned wants her land for the water This was insane The inquisitors fees for Hatty would come from Hatty’s estate she supposed She wondered how her father and brothers would manage to pay her fees She heard the guards talk and say the expenses for torture and burning were great As were the cost for their food, drink, and their diversions As if torturing were not enough entertainment
The sound of screaming suddenly pierced her senses Someone was being pulled on the rack again She knew that pain too well Not being able to stand the smell of blood and listen to the screams any longer She struggled to crawl to the dark corner of the cell She lost track of time being in the dark for so long Only seeing slivers of light through the opening of doors As the guards came and went But she calculated Samhain would soon arrive Possibly even this evening
The village would be preparing and celebrating The ending of the last harvest and the beginning of a new year Honoring their dead ancestors Setting a place for them at the table She wondered if her father and brothers would set a place for her next year Telling her tale as they have done for her mother and her grandmother before her About now her brothers would be taking stock of the herds and grains Deciding which animals to slaughter Preparing stores of meat, fruits, and vegetables In order to help them survive the coming winter
A huge bonfire would be lit in the village And the villagers would extinguish all other fires Each family lighting their hearth from the common flame Bonding the families of the village together. One big happy family she thought with irony She still knew not who turned her in But one thing she was sure of and that was fear changed people Or maybe it only brought out their true selves
She shifted trying to get comfortable and began to drift off into a merciful sleep When she awoke hours later she sensed a difference in the air She heard drums keeping time And she could see and smell old autumn leaves gently swirling in her cell She thought she saw a gate, opening wide And from this gate appeared the dark mother in her terrible naked glory
She froze -fear overtaking her She closed her eyes tightly only to feel a gentle touch Her mind crossing another’s And when she found the strength to open her eyes There stood her mothers mother
Her grandmother’s arms inviting She stands, pain forgotten She feels the nights stretching behind the days till She reaches the darkness where all of her is ancestor It is who she has been all along She is ready for this journey, crossing the dark river Into the country of death
She will join her ancestors and her witch sisters Breathing freer knowing that her death Will shed her of her female body Cleansing her of the sin of being a woman Who is more than the sum of her part’s Taking the dark mothers hand, now hearing whispering and laughing Her grandmother smiles and she sees the moon and stars above her They cross the veil together, the gate gently closing behind them
She understands clearly now In Mabs cold womb life will start again A child of light to begin a new The wheel continues to spin, the cycle continues And she will always be a part of it all ~M