I went all day without speaking to her
And I drank Cabernet by the bottle
and admired the artwork put on display
Walking, observing, feeling an undeserved
sense of soundness
There was one painting that I was particularly fond of
It was entitled "The Embrace"
A faceless man in black and blue was pursuing a faceless
woman in pink and white
She shied away from him
She was too bashful
One blue arm attempted to comfort her
from the world as she knew
Or maybe from the uncertainties of the world
that he imposed onto her
Bloomed century plants envelop her completely
And I stood there and pondered and drank more wine
Then I thought,
"She's going to become nonexistent
               just after becoming so beautiful."
And I took another sip of my drink
The only thing that existed in that moment were
the paintings on the walls, the wine in my belly, and the
associates that I went to the art show with
For those hours that I was there, I was separated from reality
Multiple calls were made soon after I returned to squadron
Multiple calls were ignored
I knew that I was in the wrong
So I kept making attempts to reach her
from a thousand miles away
making myself look like an *** in the process
It wasn't until the next morning that she contacted me
All of her texts were short, dry, and cold
I could tell that she was hurt
So I called again, this time I could hear her voice
"You're just an *******. You don't even care."
I listen
My stomached churned slightly from the guilt
of knowing that she's not entirely wrong
I could be so much better, but it's hard to fight against
vices ingrained in your core
Like instincts of self preservation
Like fear
Although I'm not always successful, I still try
She resists me for a little while then succumbs
to the pull of my world
Then I remember the painting
And I understood