So yeah,
On the subject of “**** him,”
Which you did, for three months or so
In a place three thousand or so
Miles away and
I’m sure his blue eyes gleamed,
When he saw your *** naked,
And I’m sure those blue eyes rimmed
With tears when you told him you weren’t coming back
And he’d have 3,000 miles between him and that ***.

So now you’re a whole ******* ocean
And 246 days later
With a boy with brown eyes,
Me,
Whose **** is bigger,
So they say,
“Like an upgrade,” with the included price tag,
“Like an upgrade,” which you justify as
“Not that bad, really not too bad,”
But you won’t leave me for him.
Will you?