from the walls here in this fort,
i have completely protected myself as long as i don't leave.
i am armed with swords words of hate
walls of avoidance
and armies full of the wicked that believe in me
but some days i look outside
and wonder what it could be like
if i didn't worry about
if someone would play the intricate chess game
that is my heart
and become victor
but only for them to sweep the board
and make me slowly pick up every pawn into place.
and then i find myself looking at you
wild child, born to roam and fly among the savage
nymph, with a soul like ripples on a lake at midnight
odysseus, someone who is alluring enough to keep me entertained
but of course, you could never stay
and those feelings could never stayed, no matter how many nights i stayed up
thinking of those winsome eyes
the idea of you could never stay
i have locked myself up
in order to protect myself.
what i would do if i meant that you could be let in, though
what i would do.