Sleep deprived.
Its 2.30 in the morning
and im smiling to myself like an idiot over someone else’s love story.
Sometimes I fear the closest I will ever get to the feeling of love or being loved will always be found in written words or acted out in movies.
Pure and typical escapism at its best.
Always trying to find a way to have something you always crave for deeply.
When the world is telling you no
you need to be a strong independent woman and all you do is end up relying on others for this sort of love they can give you.
Which you cannot give yourself.
It’s rather sad really seeing as the truth is we all die alone.
We humans always crave something we cannot have
when we have what we believe is everything we end up being wrong.
Money cant buy you everything.
Love can’t get you everything.
Having a lot of friends doesn't necessarily mean you are liked and will be remembered.
So if you could live as a strong independent being would you?
Or do you secretly like this graving for attention, affection?  
Yet at the same time it hurts just like having that last piece of cheese cake when you know you shouldn't.
You will feel worse afterwards for breaking your so called diet
But you really want them few minutes of pleasure that you dearly miss.
When that cheesecake rests in your mouth.
Until the last bite and then its gone
and all that is left is that feeling of regret and guilt.