Waiting
       to
           die

feels
           a lot

      like

           death.

   I drive

       yesterday

with my wife
      to a distant
location a few
        hours away

       and,
all it was

    was,

        anxiety

    for me.

        ******* drivers ,
       one after
    the other.

      My wife and I

    get to the point

       where we
realize that

    I simply

     dislike people-
  
      most people,
because of their
  selfishness and
the
ME ME ME
I I I I I I I,
      I come first
  way of these people.

    I have
       no fun
in life
     any more
       with these
people.

   I literally hate
     crowds because
I  dislike
     and
distrust
      people.

   I breathe in
anxiety
      and I exhale
anxiety.

     This life *****!!

   These people turn
me into,
      someone that
I don't like.

      And I am a man.
I never blame
     anyone for my
       troubles
          but;

a mere 5 minutes
  out in that world
    with those
ME ME ME ME
I I I I I folks?

   They turn my
blue skies BLACK!

  Some folks live life.
     I live this life
waiting to die just to get away
       from all of
the selfishness
          and
           anxiety.

   The rounds
that I keep
    going back
into the ring for?

   Those aren't
       for me
any longer.

    I have lived
what life that
   I wanted to.

  But, for as
long as He
    deems it
     necessary
for me to
   step into
that ring....

   I will honor
His wishes.