climbing up the stairs, into the sky
i can see a vast body of water below me, far below
he and i are climbing, he is young and scared he will fall through the stairs
the stairs are slippery, the wind is strong
i tell him it's okay but i'm scared too
i'm so scared.
i can feel myself slipping through
i release my grip and fall
i fall fast
"stop yourself when you feel safe"
i stop myself and i am just above the surface of the water
i look up and see the dock - a man is standing at the edge, staring at me
a crowd forms, i am hanging by a rope
i try to swim frantically to the shore and i see a floating ladder
i swim to the ladder, i climb to the top
"take this"
he throws a black inflatable at me
i fall off the ladder, i'm underwater
the coldness stings my nostrils and lungs
i come to the surface and the crowd is staring at me, laughing
"i said take this"
he throws the black inflatable at me again
i grab it and swim towards the dock
i see him and i miss him, need him
noise fills my head
and i'm awake