You sit behind me in class,
And perhaps I am so acutely aware of your presence because
I remember what you said behind
the safety of your keyboard and it made my heart
flutter.

Or perhaps it is because
You sat on the other side of the room until
I told you my secret;
because I was never very good at keeping secrets,
And now I can feel you brush my back
And play with my hair
And your eyes burn the back of my head
But you blush and apologize when I notice.

Perhaps this is all so
complicated
Because you're already in love
But it isn't with me.
And you're a good guy,
You'd never want to hurt her
But I want you for myself
And doing things that might hurt
In the best of ways.

Or perhaps I am overly optimistic,
maybe uncharacteristically so.
But I remember the heat of your hand on my arm
And the way you pulled back a moment and looked me in the eyes
Because that tingle of skin couldn't have only been felt
on my end.

All I know is this is so unlike anything
I've experienced before.
It's 3 years in the making.
And I can wait a little longer
A lot longer
For you.