living without you is painful, at first
the amount of time crying over bath drains
oh then there's the drunken conversation with strangers
its embarassing, how i will tear my life apart when you're gone
then after about six months, someone with a hero complex comes along
and i will allow them to invest time and affection into me that i have no intentions of returning
it'll be a cheap distraction, not even thrilling - but i will project my attachment onto the unsuspecting soul
they won't know any better, and i will recover quickly after the break with them
in an attempt to rid my hair of your scent, to rub your prints off my bones
i will cover it up with strangers' lips and other boys' habits, a quick fix
then after a year or so i will allow myself to drink too much
and spend the night talking about who i am really
thinking of and if they're smart then they run
if not, they hang around and keep putting
****** adhesive on a wound that i
need therapy for and i grow
to resent them for trying to be
better than you, even though that's
what i trained them for, my body rolls
with waves of heat because there is no way
i turn into a cruel monster, breaking as many
minds as i can reach because if not, i would have to
admit to what i am feeling, and what i feel is the idea of
settling, the spine choking ***** inducing settling of your life being
mundane, accepting a life without you in it is exactly that to me