In the dark,soft
Feather-light
Moments before my mind either shuts off like an old game,
With a click
Or becomes more vivid in my impossible dreams, splashing colors where white walls once stood, bare
A soothing float on a petal, swirling in the stream of my thoughts
I find that music helps me to avoid the latter,
Keeping the warm, comforting possible improbables from welling up in my eyes and mind
People and places twisting into threads tied at the middle and ends to each other.
Silence, in these instances, fill me with terror.
Dread, fear,
For impending calamity
For the dreams pooling behind my tonsils
Demanding to be seen and understood
For me to drop this eggshell life
To let all the small joys I work for shatter like cheap wine glasses
And to pursue the unlikely future,
Leave the definite present
And forget the shimmering past.