I don’t know if I have enough heart left to give to anyone else in sharing I’m always
back at the start just trying to be myself and pretend I’m caring and it’s glaring me in
the face this stalled pace                       at which I’m                      crawling through my
own life trying not to                                    cringe                                 from the deep cuts of
the knife that you all                                                                                       call love it all feels
to me like a clifftop                                                                                            kiss goodbye with
a hard shove and                                                                                                 from where I
stand it makes me                                                                                                 wonder if I
misunderstand it                                                                                                  what I thought
was the right way                                                                                               that I should but
apparently I really                                                                                             misunderstood
and it all makes me                                                                                         beg and cry out to
everyone in this part                                  please save my heart        there’s so little  left of
the me that could ever                                                                           believe couldn’t this
god ****** world just                                                                      once let me keep a little
piece all I ask of this terrible                                                           wretched ******* lifetime
is a life that’s actually all mine                                                   let me build something and
protect it and keep it safe as my                                          own beautiful charm safe from
the chaos and the harm am I worth                              so little do I count for so much less
that I should endure my heart being                      belittled and beaten under this much
stress I don’t even know anymore how to       trust and the machine that has become
my day to day survival is so filthy with rust I just want to feel like I am a human being
with some worth and knowing deep down that I never will be, is the very worst.