Spent my New Year's eve
staring at my walls.
They have not always been these four,
should have been walking out the door.
Leave without making sure I'm missed.

Dressed warmly,
with some solid shoes,
and a smile as wide as the rust belt.
Feeling like I can't loose,
hoping to find something to make the pain melt.

It didn't melt, it froze,
In the Colorado cold.
I did it to people that were old bros.
Makes me really ill.
How did I make it this low?
My soul is as smelly as some fermenting sourdough.

Wish we were between our four walls.
Twelve ***** and a cement goose,
48 beers feeling like we can't loose.
Probably put someone in a noose.
Leave the facade at that tree,
or else you cannot talk to me.
Golly ******* gee,
lets go to the mailbox to ***.
Give us all a good laugh like hehe.

those were the walls I wish I stared at,
covered in Tyvex home wrap,
and all kinds of other crap.
With more memories than we can all remember,
until we meet after we go to the big slumber,
and hang out together with Hoone, Buffet, Slug, and all the others that were with us,
at our highest of highs,
and lowest of lows.
for now life doesn't blow.
it's all about the food,
and not the show.
Hope that wasn't rude,
yet it seems I need to go.

Where... not sure but out that door is all I know.
new job, city, state, country, career...
where to go, not ******* sure,
but hopefully to fix all the wrongs I have ever done,
can't even think of a funny pun,
thinking that I am shunned, and on the run.
Feeling like I should give up and be done,
but I don't want to get rid of the two things that make me feel whole,
my memories and my love.
all I got left to get me to the
new place to be at,
maybe get a cut,
and a new Oakland raiders hat,
possibly a new Louisville bat.