Im going for a walk. A walk to clear my head. Clear it right out. Take away the memories, burn away the knowledge, i don't care. Everything need's to be moved out of my mind and thought's and sold at a garage sale for all i care. This fresh air isnt working. Where's my lighter, come here cancer. I take a deep breath in and take in all the toxin's with it, hopeing maybe a chemical reaction will effect everything going on in my head, melting away everything. Step, inhale, step, exhale. While blowing out the toxin, i blow out my thought's and memory and walk right back into them. Blow by blow, im taking them for you. Puff by puff, im taking these in for sanity. Half way done and block's from home i keep looking over my shoulder hoping maybe you or someone like you will follow quickly after. Oh cigarette, why must the comfort you bring over me disappear once you've left me? But like you, the cigarette did not respond, because the cigarette was gone and out of my hand's. Out of reach. So i stand there, looking at the empty space where the just barely burning end of the cigarette settles into place and i just watch the snow take over. I watch the once visibly lit cigarette turn black and into ash's. Even though the cigarette's burnt out, im still standing here, uncertain as to why im here, but im here and im waiting. I will wait until dusk and if the spark comes back, i will move at the paste the spark moves. Just to make sure i stay with it. But if not, i will go home and i will relight another cigarette, hoping maybe this is the right one.