Fireflies strike lightning in their bellies
all to find that perfect mate;
love spoken in a Morse Code of light.

Lacking bio-luminescence, I shine
my MagLite in your face
on and off and on and off and
you refuse to let me on or
get me off.

I realize we are not lightning bugs
but I’m starting to think
we have no spark;

perhaps I should change tactics.

A male porcupine seduces the ladies
by giving them a *******;
should I pull out the plastic tarp?
A male giraffe drinks the female’s *****;
how thirsty can you make me?

Lady terrapin turtles are won
with just a tickle of the cheek;
lady lemurs like when their men stink;
and a dung beetle will fill a hole with ****.

Look, I’ve taken you to dinner already,
we’ve had a couple overpriced cocktails-
that’s like a peacock showing his feathers
and I’m confident I have ******* pretty feathers;
Daddy told me that should be enough
and that sometimes she’ll play hard to get
and sometimes you just have to take what you want.
Things don’t need to get messy
-that’s on you-

but we are just animals, after all