It’s not like I don’t want to die
Because I do.
Fifty-six pills and my body didn’t react
A knife ready
But the moment it’s almost there—
My final thought—
My mother who I have not seen in a month
Decides to show.
What is it that interrupts me?
It feels like my mind is pulling constantly
My therapist says
I have no explanation except—
God is watching over you.
Why?
I’m not special.
I want to die.
I’m tired of the challenges.
I want to die.
I don’t think I should be here.
I feel like an abomination.
I’m ready to die.
Please take me—