I have the same name,
The same last name,
Same eyes, same blood type.
but I have never had the same self-confidence.
I was never sure of anything except my uncertainty.
All your life you have been doing what you wanted.
Now all my life, I continue doing what you want.
Your gaze, when you ask "so what do you want to be?"
And I answer “I don’t know”
Makes me think that all I want is to be frivolous and unserious.
In fact, I always knew.
Was just afraid of your disapproval and condemnation.
My poor mother.
All you do is brilliant.
except the family.
Your healing hands are able to cure everything but boredom,
Everything but apathy.
My gorgeous mom,
you would always believe in me more than I did.
In your eyes the picture of me was always more colorful and perfect.
I'm anxious for disappointing you.
That’s why I don’t tell anything about myself.
That’s why I keep my interests in a separate apartment.
You are so sick and tired of carrying your life, of carrying my life and dozens of other people.
When I was little I looked at you and never understood.
I didn’t want to be like you, but I never knew.
Now I am about to grown up.
Now I see much clearly.
I admire you.
But still I don’t want to be like you.
Because I have only your eyes, your name, your blood type
But any hint of your strength and certainty.
All I want is to be frivolous and unserious
And try to make you think that I have become all you wanted me to become.