Had no idea where I was
But I found a way back.


It wasn't so much that I wanted to **** myself.
It was more so that I had convinced myself that I had to.
The hurt was all too much and dark that the little rays of sunshine didn't matter.
Is feeling better the lifting of this stone heavy weight in my heart.
In light flutters that dance twice the night.
I'm just another hopeless romantic that roams the streets alone, all day and night.
It was then driving again that I had realized that what I had crying and moaning about was so silly in the grand scheme of things.
I guess I could laugh at my silly self induced sufferings.
But why was I drawn there?
Why did I feel paralysis in this state?
So eager to believe that there was really an escape.
An escape to what?
Nothingness?
Not... Paradise, but nothing.
I still had a little hope that I could find the light after all.
To one day look back at it all and laugh..
Laugh at my nativity, vulnerability, and innocence.
Thank all those who helped transform me by betraying me, ignoring me, leaving me, seducing me, then leaving me again.
To those who gave a little bit of their tender love..
But they were just exploring it all.
Never unfolding the true flowering potential of us all.