a deep-seated ache
permeates my bones
seeping into the
marrow
into the innermost
parts of me
i breathe it in
and breathe out hope
watching it cloud and then
disappear
i have to
get this out of me
get it
out

and now
with my blood
pooling
on the floor
my insides
stuffed with straw
i smile

a scarecrow man
pretending to feel