So many questions come to mind when I start to think about my life,
Who have I become? Why do I feel emotionally numb? Why do I feel stuck?
I pass it off as being caught in a rut, but deep down I know my strife,
I create hidden monsters that foster these thoughts I blame on bad luck.

I try to write and describe these beings so anybody can understand,
How they have learned to attach like a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
I’m always surprised as they reprise actions I feel are out of my hands,
But what I can’t see I’ve came to realize is what everyone sees showing.

I just feel so lost.

I can’t catch a break when I hear my mistakes again and again,
Some days I have it all and others I barely can call myself a friend.
It’s not easy walking in these shoes with many holes in the sole,
As I contemplate the bad in life, seeing good seems like an unreachable goal.

Cycle through it all, only pay attention to the ending cost,
Went to find myself but realized now my mind is lost.
I wish I knew the differences in real emotions and ones made in my head,
But the only difference is my indifference to change how the monsters are fed.