to all the friends ive had before
im sorry im sorry i changed
im not who i used to be i said id never change
sometimes i feel like who i was was who i was supposed to be
i was fun i was free
i wasnt who i am today
i feel like maybe i was more put together when i was at rock bottom
its what im used to its who im supposed to be
now im sober now im clean now i feel different
i never hear from you guys anymore i never see your faces
im not fun anymore i know but im still me
i used to have so many friends i used to be used to people wanting to be around me
now im friends are like me
lately ive been glimpsing twords the past its been around me
ive seen all their faces theyve offered my favorite things to me
i said no
they told me they dont know how i do it
i dont wanna die i dont wanna lose control again
it feels so good to reminisce but i dont wanna take one step closer
this time its harder
this time i have to be around
but now i have to see whos really in control
am or in control or who i used to be
to all the friends ive had before i’m sorry but i cant step only closer
i have to love from a distance
i have to care from a far
i cant step any closer
even if i want to i cant lose control
i cant be that person anymore i cant lose myself once more
because this is who i am now
this is who im supposed to be
i cant step backwards i cant go back to who i used to love
who i used to feel comfortable with
now they make me nervous
now they make me feel lost
to all the friends ive lost
im sorry but i cant step closer