I'll admit it
i'm terrified
there's nothing i can do
but scream and cry and break
because everything in life
just seems to break, and burn, and end
everything i do seems to be so wrong,
so judged by everyone in this lonely world
... as if they know what to compare my life to.
they don't know me.
they don't know what i have been through.
they say i am so happy, like i never stop smiling.
that may be what i look like, but inside...
i feel like dying. like just ending it right then and there.


so he asks me why i have changed so much...
little does he know, it is because of him.
he shattered my heart into millions of pieces,
never to be fully repaired.
he tells me not to be depressed,
not to cut,
not to be so ******* insecure.
but he should know, that's a little easier said than done.
sometimes, i just don't know how to handle it.
i can't keep hiding this from my friends.
like nothing's wrong.
but it's all a lie.
just the walls i have built up to protect myself
from being hurt again.