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December 2018

by matterhorn

He awoke. His eyes opened slowly with a purposeful slowness; an action that for most people is the beginning of their life was, for him, a procrastination. He arose. The floor felt cold, unwelcoming as he stumbled reluctantly to the sink. The bristles rasped against his teeth, gums bleeding out of spite. He entered. Breakfast—a lonely egg, boring toast—entered his body; each bite was scooped with the utilitarian vigor of one who is no longer enchanted by food, yet the relationship must continue: a compulsory marriage without option for divorce. This discomfort washed down with lemon-water. He contemplated. Thoughts, those musings that are feared, condemned by most and yet became the greatest of comforts for him, reminded him that one day it all would end and he would be free. He wasted. He stretched out his hands, offering up his life force in the daily sacrifice to the eager god that, in return, lit up with the brightness of a thousand stars that blinded him from all that he wished not to see. He showered. Cold water ran down his soul, icing the most superficial inflammations while taunting the deepest wounds; no matter how long he remained behind the curtain, there would be no true respite. He returned. The blackness beckoned. He entered willingly, surrendering himself to the dark embrace of that demonic respite, his beloved above all others. He died, once again.
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Written by
matterhorn
18 / M / Texas
For You?
Written by
matterhorn
18 / M / Texas
Published
Dec 28, 2018
Time
2m
Notes

© Ethan M. Pfahning 2018

Tags
#life#slowly#dying#what#is#the#difference
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