If only you knew how it felt-
That the few inches between us in the bed
are not something you wish to bridge.
You let them grow inside of themselves, instead,
Without lifting a finger to reach me,
Or turning a cheek to look at me.

It has been three months since I've disappeared
and you have not called me.
You have not thought of me.
I am a bleached memory that has begun to look
better washed out,
Like I was ***** before
When it was sore,
Like you were always on the edges of things.

If only you knew how it felt-
To see my eyes and not think of anything.
To not feel anything.
To be free from everything that encapsulates me.
Like I was ***** before
When it was sore,
Like the eyes didn't show anything more.

If only you knew how it felt-

Knowing that you don't love me anymore.