It's hard to write about what I'm feeling inside
when I'm not sure what that is myself most of the time.
I never like to talk about myself
about how I feel
about what I'm thinking
so I don't.
I'll avoid questions
I'll change topics
I'll prematurely end conversations
and I'll shut people out.
I've done this so often that I think
I somehow got lost in the shuffle.
I've put up walls I don't even think I can climb.
You ask me how I'm feeling & I don't know.
You ask me what I'm thinking & I don't know.
Somewhere along the way I forgot the combination
and now I'm locked out like everyone else.