We never got to laugh at the way that chemotherapy ruined your hair, and how luxurious it was when it grew back. even stronger than before!

we ran out of time to name all of your tumors, and giggle when they were evicted from your body. you felt even better than before!

even when your funeral was under way, our laughter filled the halls. because, even in death we couldn't forget your mishaps and jokes.

it was especially touching at your wake, when your brother smashed his head on a door frame. like the hand of you could only do.

and now we keep on smiling.

when my dad insists that a shower curtain makes a perfectly fine table cloth.

or when my future husband cares more for our aging ill cat, better than he could ever push cradles for babies we won't have. I smile!

I smile and think that you cannot be near. Maybe your next life has already started, surely you don't need to worry and watch us. The same smile that you passed unto us, the best gift you can teach your children in hard times.