I lay in the water, hot enough to sting but not enough to burn.
I'm reminded of you. How you were always just hot enough to make me feel relaxed but never hot enough to set my soul ablaze.
I realize in this moment that you weren't sent to save me, that was kept for someone else. I know him now.
I want to lay in water that is hot enough to scald. So I can feel the passion that burns in me when I'm with him.
My scalp begins to tingle as I wash my hair brining memories back of the night I learned of her.
But then my souls rests knowong that the last thing that made my scalp tingle were his lips pressed against my hair so firm I felt it on my skull.
I realize in all of this choas the thought of drowning under the water no longer haunts me.
I drift into the idea of marraige, a growing belly and old age. Not once did you cross my mind, only him.
The water is cold but my soul is on fire, hot enough to keep me warm forever.