My life will be one of those magic tricks where I ask you to "pick a card, any card," and you do and you memorize it and put it back in the pile and I shuffle the deck and try to give you the right card but I don't know how to do this trick, and even though there's a tiny chance I could hold up your card, I never get it right. That's what my life will be like and I don't know how I feel about that or even how I should feel about that and I don't know what to do about it.