I’ll have you know that I only dream in purple now
            And that the only flowers I can smell are yellow roses
            That leave my eyes wondering why the daylight went out
                                                            Why the rays went dry and cracked across the petals
                                                            Why it isn’t special anymore

I’ll have you know that I took an Alka-Seltzer tablet for my heartburn
            And that the knot in my stomach is so large now
            I don’t remember if I’m tongue-tied or not
            There is too much to speak of
So I’m quiet now
Trying to swallow the orange juice you gave me when I’d just finished brushing my teeth

I’ll have you know that my eyes crinkle when I am happy
            Especially when the sky is so bright that even your smile can’t outshine it
And I know you dislike how ugly I look when I grin like that
            So I’ve been trying so very hard lately to crinkle my potato chips instead
                        To save for the night when we’re finally outside
                        Alone with the Moon as our chaperone
                        He, there to make sure that I wouldn’t shine brighter than him
                                    The Moon is jealous in that way, I think
                        And if I wore yellow like you’d like me to
                                    He’d retreat behind the clouds and blush
                                    Because he remembers the way the sun used to dance like that
                                    And he would miss her a little, I think

But anyways,
            I’m saving the crinkled potato chips cooked in sunflower oil just for you
            In the pockets of my very simple sundress
            For that night when we’re finally outside

And I’d toss them at you in the moment I was happiest,
I’d look most beautiful then
And those are my least favorite kind

Knowing they’d bounced off your shoulder would make them taste lovelier, somehow
            So I’d eat the whole bag as a midnight snack
            Dancing by the light of your smile with my arms outstretched
            Inviting the Man in the Moon to lick the salt from my fingers…

And when he wouldn’t
            Well
                        I’d notice, then
                        I’d gaze into the sockets of his pock-marked face
Feeling quite foolish and child-like
                        Staring blankly at my own crinkled, chipped hands
And trying so very hard not to weep
                        I’d retreat and rest my cheek against your neck
Asking very quietly who cut out his tongue
                        And how long the wolf has howled for him

My shallow breathing would crack your eardrums
                        But at least I would know you were listening
At least you would finally understand
That the sunflower petals were shriveling up in your hands
                        And if you tossed them at me, they would be fuller, somehow
                                   And yellow again just for you

I’ll have you know that I can’t remember my favorite things anymore
                        And though I’ve squeezed my short-term memory so hard it’s cracked down the middle,
                        I’ll never remember why the only flowers I like are white roses
                        Or why you consistently make my dreams taste purple and frothy
                        Like a swelling tongue that puts my stomach in knots that even Alka-Seltzer won’t
dissolve

I’ll have you know that I’ve awoken so many times
To wring the neck of a withering image,
That I’m gagging on the thorns I never noticed in my sundress pockets
Mixed with those crinkled potato chips I’ve been crushing to toss at you
            In the moment that I am most happiest
            And we find ourselves outside of the dream
                                                That I never want to live