Windows cracked open to morning light,
scrubbed clean by black boiled beans
mixed with milky white.
Stretch and wish something else
something better had happened
touch?
Feet fumble.
Back yells complaints.
The sun illuminates clouds
of lung pushed smoke.
It's cold.
Damp.
Light steams the dew on the grass
the green ground boiling ***.
Boiling ***.
Heat.
Hot.
Your body.
Lips hips fingertips.(New found tricks?)
Naughty.
I shake desire away from my mind
and suppress sensuality
with determination
or denial.
Your steps startle heart beats.
Eyes dart in avoidance.
Image of you wrapped in sheets.
I offer up smokes,
tokes,
jokes,
false hopes.
I have nothing I can count on,
but my addictions.
Walk, stumble, sigh,
body bathed with afflictions.
I stack wood,
by a hungry stove.
Fast food into a fattened black steel belly.
I made you breakfast,
but you ignore me.
Eyes speak cold truth.
You care too much
to feel like that
for me.