when you tell yourself you deserve what you're getting can u call it settling what if the happiness you truly deserve are the ones that doesn't knock in front of your doorstep and tell you to accept it maybe it is the one you need to find when you're about to give up on everything else then you thought of the reason why some things still matter to you maybe happiness is the echo of your cries at 3 am hoping to forget and start again the only thing that stops you from seeing the light is your eyes who doesnt want to shed a tear i saw myself in the mirror and thought of how many times people left me and the bitter taste of the coffee that stained my shirt i remember seeing everyone try to smile when the only thing that's good is the word nothing i hope someday someone would pay attention someone would dare to tell me im lost i am drowning when i am supposed to enjoy the sand in my feet i do not want to merely sit in front of the television just to tell people the scenario of the old films flashing in front of my eyes i dont want to tell myself im happy when the only thing i care about is how people intertwine their hands with a stranger