I remember the
first time I saw you
17-year-old me
was into it
when you looked
right past me

a year and a half later
you acted like a five year old
despite being five years
older than me
and I thought
it was all a joke

four months later
we’re signing a lease
and our friends are
telling us to cool it
on the public affection,
now I am five years old

one year later
I learn that
you’re a violent drunk
with a begging, sobbing attachment
to a woman who had you
lick the dirt from her pumps

and I love you anyway
and I give you all of me
anyway,
and one year after that
curse you
and cringe at your name