“How are you,” they ask
Broken, alone, useless, unloved
Confused, betrayed, fragile

“I’m Fine”

I take on people’s problems, but never my own
Because then i become:
Selfish, self absorbed, obsessed, egotistical
How do you think I feel?

I got quieter
Nights endless
Blades bigger
Sleeves longer
Meals smaller
Music crashing
No one even noticed

Every day I was tormented
I had fallen into a trapdoor of depression

My spirits sank

My life was a phone battery
Every time I was used up
People left me to sit in the dark
Just until they felt the need
To use me again

My friends called me their dandelion
They said they could make a wish
And I would make it come true
And then someone finally told me
That dandelions were just weeds

Weeds are useless, unwanted
Just how I was
No place among the beautiful flowers

All it takes is some kind of elephantine smile
To hide an injured soul
And they never know

How broken you really are

Depression is the incapability
To develop a future

People think depression is
Darkness, crying, misery
Depression is the consistent feeling
Of being numb

I was tired of crying, tired of yelling, tired of being...
me
Trying to get people to understand, and being alone
Being angry, feeling crazy...
Being different and feeling lost
Feeling lost inside, most of all
I was tired of being tired

I wanted to be… okay
But there was something
Inside screaming
“You don’t deserve it”

I was done
Done with being used, being detached, and most of all
Being left in the dark…

...alone...
Abandoned?
By All I loved?
What a pity

Then one day
I realised
No
I am worth something
To somebody somewhere
I do not accept this
And I refuse to give up


I am strong because I know my weaknesses
I am beautiful because I am aware of my flaws
I am wise because I learn from my mistakes
I can love because I have felt hate and
I can laugh because I have felt sadness

It’s all about finding the calm in chaos
I wake up every morning
To the demons I left the night before
I fight them every minute of the day
And that…
Makes me stronger than anyone
I’ve ever known