I think I knew
from the start
that
it wouldn't work.

That I would look back
Remember all of it.
All of us.
And call myself stupid.

I remember
The first time
When he made me
smile.

I felt beautiful.
He loved me,
I thought.
I loved him.

I remember
The last time
When he made me cry.

I felt awful.
He never loved me,
I thought.
I still loved him.

I remember
When I saw her.
He was with her.
He was smiling.

He loves her.
Not me.
Stop it, stupid.
He's happy.