How many times will my name be called within one day?
From the depths of my conscious to the outermost membrane,
It's a situation I cannot just walk away from,
And the insinuation that I'll give up only in my dreams,
Just makes me want to go even more,
For you believe I'm not me,
For you believe that I'm a liar and a manipulator.
If I'm just that fake I might as well go,
Leave my stuff here before I sink further,
And the temptation to bury myself in toxic waters is great,
Nothing you've ever felt will compare to the hurt,
In my chest and in my cords,
So take my hand before I say goodbye.
Before I say goodbye.
Spend some time with me,
Sit with me and laugh out the fears,
The fears that life has no point and I have no purpose,
It must be tonight and If He was real then I'd use that as my pedestal,
I wouldn't care if I was called fake cause if It keeps me awake then so be it,
Spit out your truths; do you believe I will make it in life?
I'm tired of being told I cannot,
That I cannot start this life off or make it with the dreams that I have.
If I'm just that fake I might as well go,
Leave my stuff here before I sink further,
And the temptation to bury myself in toxic waters is great,
Nothing you've ever felt will compare to the hurt,
In my chest and in my cords,
So take my hand before I say goodbye.
Before I say goodbye.
And the poison on my wrist,
Seeps out once again and into the air it dissipates into gas,
Enough for me to inhale and drink,
Drink until the world is fuzzy and grey,
Don't care, Don't care,
It's this pointless verb of dying that won't carry me on,
Don't care, Don't care,
Just believe in me, Just believe in me.
If I'm just that fake I might as well go,
Leave my stuff here before I sink further,
And the temptation to bury myself in toxic waters is great,
Nothing you've ever felt will compare to the hurt,
In my chest and in my cords,
So take my hand before I say goodbye.
Before I say goodbye.
Oh and before I say goodbye,
Place a rose in my hands,
With the name I was given but not the name I received,
***** you if you think I'm not me,
***** you if you think that this is manipulation,
Do you realize how much I drown in your hate?
I want to thrive and I want to strive for more and more,
It's just before I say goodbye,
I'll be watching for a way to survive,
You wrought hope and said I'd be living mediocre,
Did you realize that I don't care?
It's something I need before I say goodbye,
Before I say goodbye.
Before I say goodbye.
Before I say goodbye.